


"you don't have to say i love you (to say i love you)"

by seunqmins



Series: our gazes meet and I see you in vignette [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Han Jisung | Han/Lee Felix, Strangers to Lovers, one sided Hwang Hyunjin & Kim Seungmin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:14:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27739750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seunqmins/pseuds/seunqmins
Summary: When Kim Seungmin is in love with his roommate who never likes him back.orWhen Lee Minho may or may not be in love with the guy living next to his apartment.oran anti-climatic way to fall for each other as told by Kim Seungmin and Lee Minho
Relationships: Kim Seungmin & Lee Minho | Lee Know, Kim Seungmin/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Series: our gazes meet and I see you in vignette [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2029132
Comments: 6
Kudos: 139





	"you don't have to say i love you (to say i love you)"

**Author's Note:**

> this is my FIRST minho/seungmin fic hhuhuhu please bear with me XO  
> it was supposed to be a hyunjin/seungmin but i was like "uhh,, minho fits this character more"  
> so i'm sorry already to hyunjin bb for making you seungmin's roommie/one-sided lovie here hehehe XO
> 
> Just a fair warning  
> \- there's implied sexual content  
> \- there's cursing

  
  


  
  


  
  


_You don't have to say I love you to say I love you_

_Forget all the shooting stars and all the silver moons_

_We've been making shades of purple out of red and blue_

_Sickeningly sweet like honey, don't need any money_

_All I need is you_

It's a no-brainer, Seungmin thinks, as he sees the discarded clothing and messy living room of their shared apartment that yet again, his roommate is not alone. His roommate has brought a guest home. Again. And he isn't exactly sure of the numbers of the guests his roommate brought before. The noises they are making are just an indication that they didn't care that Kim Seungmin is in the apartment.

But _thank fuck god_ they made it in the bedroom.

Because Seungmin wouldn't know what to do if he ever does see his roommate having a sex with someone he barely knows. And he'd like to spare his eyes _thankyousomuch_. With a sigh, he heads back out to the front door.

The hallway is freezing, he notes as he slides down on the cold floor. He removes his bag from his shoulders and takes out his airpords to drown out the noises coming from the apartment.

"Fucking dumbass." He says, glaring at the door as if that could actually knock some sense on his roommate. But he never means his words, not actually to his best friend. Quite the opposite, if he is being honest.

Seungmin tries to drown out the noises with the blasting music from his phone. Sometimes, it works, most of the time he's stuck when his phone dies on him and he'd rather not walk in the apartment once more just to charge it, less he wants to bleach his eyes for whatever he's witnessed.

He's in love with his roommate, has been after just two weeks they have moved in during his first year in college. And now he's in his third year and he's still in love with the same man. But who couldn't be? Hwang Hyunjin is the literal meaning of sunshine. All smiles and polite words. Beautiful and passionate. Hard working and ethereal. He's the only one Seungmin's ever wanted but someone he'd also never get. He thinks he isn't enough to man up and tell him that he is painfully in love with Hwang Hyunjin.

Seungmin wonders if Hyunjin knows that he is playing Seungmin like a fool but then he doubts it because Hyunjin would probably say _oh well_ and then continue to play beer pong and break his poor poor little heart.

He's not entirely sure why he is trying to put himself into this. This misery of being in love with the same who can never see him more than just a roommate and a best friend, is it even worth it?

Minho freezes on his place, his hand on the knob of the door as he watches the boy in the corner bob his head with the music. It's not like this is the third time this week he's seen Seungmin on the same spot. And goddamn it is just Thursday. Minho doesn't understand why Seungmin insists on staying at the same spot of the hallway when he could go out and do whatever he'd like to do just to avoid the annoyingly loud sexual escapades of his roommate.

So he does what he thinks a Lee Minho wouldn't dare to do for others. He tugs one of Seungmin's airpod out of his ears and his neighbor looks up at him with shock eyes. Pretty eyes which holds thousand of galaxies.

"You shouldn't let him throw you out. He isn't the king of the world, you know?" Minho tells him.

Seungmin's eyes go bigger and he flusters by his words. "He doesn't."

"Then must be your choice to sit out here while he fucks the whole world down in your apartment?" Minho's voice is dripping from sarcasm and sharpness but Seungmin only avoids his eyes because he guesses it's only the truth. "Well, I guess, I don't want to be a bad neighbor. Come on."

"What?"

Minho only smiles and pulls Seungmin on his feet towards his apartment that is just right next to Seungmin's. "What kind of a person do you think I am to leave you in the cold freezing hallway in January?"

"A not nosy one?" Seungmin suggests.

Minho _tsks_ and opens his door for them to open.

Seungmin expects it to be something special but then he guesses he shouldn't have. Not when they actually live in the same building. Minho guides him on the couch, patting his back.

"Loosen up, why don't you?" Minho mumbles, stepping out of the living room to the kitchen.

He's been living in the same building but Seungmin doesn't actually really go out and make friends so he is not sure about the name of his neighbor. He can just ask later, anyway.

"Oh." His neighbor breaks his thought away, offering his some water. "That's all I have today since I forgot to do grocery." He says, sitting on the chair in front of the couch.

Seungmin uncaps his bottle and drinks.

"Wow, you're not actually allergic from water." His neighbor comments. Seungmin glares at him. "You're Seungmin, am I correct?"

He nods.

"Minho." His neighbor introduces. "Skipping all the formalities aside, in the three years I have spent living in the same building as you, I haven't really talked to you. Aside from today."

"I'm Kim Seungmin. 2000 liner."

"Lee Minho. 1998. Guess I'm older than you, huh.”

  
  


_It's common_ , Seungmin would like to say but he doesn't want to crush the smile Minho is sporting on his face at the moment. He is not that cruel, no matter how much Jeongin would disagree with him.

"Have you ever told your roommate that he keeps the entire floor awake every time he brings home a guest?" Minho asks.

"No." He answers.

"Are you afraid of saying so?"

"No." A very too quick response in Seungmin's humble opinion, taking a sip from the bottle.

"Are you, by chance, in love with him?"

Seungmin chokes on his water and coughs. When he is calm enough, he avoids Minho's questioning gaze. "No. Never."

"Why never?"

_Why don’t you mind your own business._

"He is only a roommate." An emphasis on the word only. _Unfortunately_.

"Is this your choice or his? Or both? Because if it's his choice then I think he's pretty blind."

_What_.

"Both." He answers, a little uncomfortable. Minho's questions are a little bit close for comfort. A _nd I don’t think Hyunjin would ever like me_. _He wouldn't even look at my way._

Seungmin struggles not to drink on his bottled water once more in case Minho blurts out another question that would shake his world.

“He must be blind.” Minho throws the comment casually as if they both have known each other and he is taking Seungmin's side. Not like he wants Minho to pick a side. It's not like he and Hyunjin are even fighting in the first place.

“What the fuck does that mean?”

“What I mean is that all these years we have been neighbors, this is the first time we got to sit like this and talk. And like yeah whatever. But now I know that you are younger than me, you are not allergic to water, and that your roommate always brings home a guest.” He waves his hands dumbly.

“Do you pay attention to the number of people he brings home?”

Minho smirks and Seungmin notes how pretty his lips are right now. “He and I share the same wall, you know, so it is hard not to. He keeps me awake because his guests are more likely very vocal.”

Seungmin runs his fingers through his hair. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

“For that.”

Minho shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “Why, do you also bring home your guests and you and your roommate have like a competition on who can bring home more by the end of the week?”

“You’re ridiculous.” Seungmin fans himself because he knows he’s beet red on his face. “And no, no. I don’t.”

“Then don’t apologize in behalf of him.”

“But he’s ---”

“Just a roommate.” He cuts off, standing up.

Seungmin all but glares at him. “You are a bastard.”

“Oh, hun, I may be a bastard but at least I’m not an idiot. Who kicks you out of the supposed shared apartment and who lets you in, noh?” Minho says, throwing a wink as he passes him by.

Seungmin would like to say that Minho's wink is fucking irritating and ugly, just like his personality but he keeps his mouth shut, especially he is in the latter’s apartment and does not want to be kicked out.

But boy, pretty lips Lee Minho can be a little cute. A little bit cute. But Seungmin would prefer to keep this information all by himself in case The Biggest Bastard inflates his already too big ego and head.

☆

“Why are you everywhere?” Seungmin hisses as soon as he sees Minho sitting on the chair in front of him. He never realizes or maybe he just doesn't notice Minho's presence before the Hallway Incident ™ but now he notices that the latter boy is also in his some classes.

But Minho doesn't answer. He never does. It's like he knows a secret or two that Seungmin can't point out which. He only smirks. And that smirk kind of knocks Seungmin up. But he isn't sure if it's good or not.

It's like he's taking his breath away and Seungmin detests it so much because how would he even live if Minho takes his breath away just like this, _noh?_

And there's a loud booming laughter that Seungmin can recognize everywhere even if he's asleep. He knows his best friend's laughter, _too fucking bad_. He's slowly closing on their seats and Seungmin wants to disappear from the Earth because as he passes by, Hyunjin gives him the look ™ that somehow burns his stomach and he! has! his! arms! on! another! man!

“That's Hyunjin.” Minho whispers, eyeing Seungmin up and down. And why is Minho telling this as if he doesn't know his own roommate and his best fried for that?

“Here.” Minho suddenly brushes his lips with tissue.

“What the fuck, man?” He splutters once he realizes that Minho has already used the tissue he wipes on Seungmin's lips. _Disgusting bastard._

“You know, you're drooling.” His voice is loud that some students near their table are looking at them.

“I'm fucking not.” He denies, shaking his head. “Shut the fuck up, will you?”

Minho only gives him a look that it's so hard to decipher. “Why are you the only one who can not see, Kim fucking Seungmin?” And then Minho is leaving with his tray. He watches as he puts his tray back and leaves the cafeteria without looking back at all.

_Just what the hell?_

☆

Han Jisung is one of a kind man, and Seungmin doesn't clearly get how Lee Minho, who is mysterious and aloof enough as he is, can stand to be around as loud and bubbly as Jisung. He is same year as him in their same university whom Minho met in the dance academy. And what's considered fun for Jisung is a drunken game of playing Uno cards.

Unfortunately for Seungmin, he is losing. And he's also halfway drunk. Because that's the idea of punishment of Jisung.

Coming to his neighbor's apartment has become somehow a habit for Seungmin. Hyunjin doesn't notice that he's been either coming late or not coming back whenever he brings “guests”. It's been three whole weeks since he started coming over. And each time he does, Minho would put a very loud music that Jisung wouldn't ask the reason why but he figures maybe Minho already has explained.

Hyunjin hasn't even asked nor glanced at his way. Seungmin is a little bit miffed about it.

He stands up to gather another bottle of beer when Minho comes up behind him.

“Do you remember the rules while you're in my apartment?” Minho is too close for his liking. He's smelling of beer and mint chocolate. He likes the smell --- the mint chocolate, not Minho. Never Lee Minho.

“Oh uhh...” Seungmin starts thinking. He tries to remember what they have talked about it but nothing comes to his mind.

“Do not think about the Idiot.” Minho reminds him, moving to grab him a bottle of beer and makes his way back to the living room. Seungmin wonders how Minho can easily read him like an open book.

He pads his way back to the living room and before he sits on the floor just like what Jisung and Minho are doing, he makes sure to knock Minho's head which earns him a snarl and a glare, “What the fuck was that for?”

“Don't call him that.” He tells him. _Don't call Hyunjin The Idiot_ is what he wants to say.

“Let me know when he stops acting like one, maybe I'll consider calling him something else.”

“Like what?” Seungmin challenges.

And the bad thing about Minho is, he also likes challenges. “Like The Biggest Fucking Idiot to ever exist on Earth, I guess?”

Seungmin is ready to throw the pillow on his lap when Jisung (thank God for his presence) cuts him. “Why don't you just two date?” Or maybe not. He wants to delete Jisung's presence all-in-all and he takes back his gratefulness for his presence.

“Sung,” Minho calls Jisung, wrapping his arm around Seungmin's neck and grins at him. “do you think we look good together?”

Seungmin begs to disagree and twists the elder's arm behind him and his contorted face makes him laugh for a second. He enjoys the pain and Minho's face is becoming redder as the seconds pass by. Maybe Seungmin exists to cause Minho his greatest pain.

“Minnie..”

Seungmin's heart drops as he sees Hyunjin standing in the doorway where Jisung mischievously is waving behind. He's not sure how Jisung has moved from the place beside Minho to wherever he is standing now.

Seungmin also drops Minho's arms immediately.

“You've never been the type to hurt people.” Hyunjin's voice register is low. That kind of sexy bed voice. Seungmin drools at it.

“I guess you don't really know Seungmin.” Minho snaps and Seungmin wants to twist his neck this time.

Hyunjin only shrugs and innocently stares at them. “I was wondering where you are these past few days.”|

“You could've asked me.”

“Well ---” Hyunjin's stare turns from him to Jisung who sashays himself on the couch. Seungmin knows that look --- hates that look --- because he never receives it from his best friend ever. He's seen it so many times on Hyunjin's face, one that says _I'm into you and you're going to end up on my bed_. “--- it's not like I care that much.”

“I thought the two of you are best friends?” Jisung asks in confusion.

Hyunjin sits beside Jisung and he can see the perfect smirk on Minho's face. God, he hates him so much right now. “It's not like you tell your best friends who you're dating with.”

“Sung, you're dating Felix, right?” Minho baits, Jisung nods and flutters his eyes. He's not sure what Jisung is trying because Hyunjin is obviously distracted with him by his side.

Jisung smiles blindingly at them, all perfect white teeth. “Do you want to play?”

Minho rolls his eyes. “We can play uno again?”

“Boring.”

“Let's play charades?”

“Ugh, Minho hyungie...”

“You want to get shitfaced and drunk, Sung?” Minho raises his brows at him.

Jisung flicks his wrist. “Drunk, possibly but not shitfaced. And you two are sooo boring that it makes me want to bring ---” He turns to his roommate who mouths his name. “Hyunjinnie with us.”

“Goodness, Sung, I wonder why Felix is still dating you. Why don't you just leave?”

“Oh, I will!” Jisung smiles and Hyunjin smiles wider now because Jisung is wrapping his hands around Jisung's, caressing him teasingly. Hyunjin likes this game. “And I'm bringing Hyunjinnie with me. Adios, boring people.” Then Jisung is dragging Hyunjin away from them.

Seungmin wants to scream as he follows the two men out and Hyunjin sheepishly has the audacity to look back at him with a glint and a thumbs up. Seungmin wants to just fucking go back to his blanket to comfort his aching heart.

“In or out?”

Seungmin jumps from his place as he hears Minho's voice. It's kind of heavy – Minho's voice is.

“You're letting the heat out, so choose if you want to get in or out.”

Seungmin is left with no choice but to come inside and let the image of Hyunjin burn at the back of his mind.

“Why did you let Jisung go with Hyunjin?” He confronts Minho who is basically just staring expectantly at him.

“He can manage.”

“You know how Hyunjin is.” Or has Minho forgotten?

Minho sighs and taps the space beside him, but Seungmin just keeps walking here and there, biting his nail in nervousness.

“Jisung is also your friend, you know?” Minho's voice is low, too. The accent is lower than Hyunjin's but he doesn't want to pay attention on that detail. Jisung is with Hyunjin, of all people, and Minho gives no fuck. “ Jisung knows you're in love with him, Seungminnie.”

Seungmin cringes at the nickname but there's something warm as Minho says it.

“That---” Seungmin is flustered.

But Minho adds, “He can take care of himself, and he knows what he's doing. So please trust him?”

“It's not like ---” He stops himself when Minho catches his eyes.

Exasperated, Seungmin falls beside the Bastard and cries himself to sleep. The last thing he knows is that Minho's hand is warm on his brunette hair. And he kind of likes it.

☆

“Your friend is a bastard.”

If anything, Seungmin is more surprised to see Hyunjin in the living room with nothing but his shorts on. He thinks he's going to be distracted or flustered the way he used to. He expects his heart beats faster but there's nothing there. Just radio silence from both him and his heart.

He glances once at Hyunjin and pops the popcorn in his mouth. “Minho hyung is. I can attest to that.”

“No, not that. The other friend last night.”

“I only have one bastard friend and that's Minho hyung.”

Hyunjin sighs and stops in front of him, hands on his waist. “That Han guy.”

Seungmin squares up and finally looks at Hyunjin. He waits for the _fuck this shit, I'm so in love with you, why are you the only one who cannot see, Hwang Hyunjin dugeun dugeun_ but there's nothing. It feels so bland and Seungmin cannot, for the life of him, understand it.

“Jisungie? What? He's a little stupid and loud but he's not a bastard.” He defends Minho's best friend. Or more likely, his also other friend.

“Yeah? Say it to my face, Kim Seungmin. I was arrested last night!”

_What_.

Hyunjin ruffles his own hair frustratedly and throws himself on the couch like the little guy he is. “You saw how he was last night with me, right? He was feeling me up, Seung. Fuck. So we made out in the car.”

“Wait --- do you even know Jisung is taken?” He asks curiously.

Hyunjin avoids his eyes.

“That's out of the question.”

“Why would you have sex with someone who you just met last night?”

His roommate shrugs in reply. “But that's beside the point. He was feeling me up, you saw it, Seung and then --- when we were making out --- what the fuck --- I just woke up with a police man tapping up my window and my junk was --- ugh --- out for everyone to see.”

“I don't get it?” Really, Seungmin doesn't. Because Jisung is taken and he isn't that type of guy.

“He may or may have knocked me out and my junk --- fuck, Seung, are you being serious --- was out in the open and I was arrested for public indecency.”

Seungmin may or may have not laughed at the thought. Karma serves real time. But then, this is his best friend --- his roommate --- and he got arrested for something like this. Seungmin nods at Hyunjin and angrily leaves the apartment.

Minho expects the three – four – now five loud knocks on the door and sighs as he sees Seungmin standing outside, hand on the air and eyes closed. He looks so so pretty and Minho cannot deny that. But he can feel the anger seeping through the other's body.

What he least expects is a knee kick on his shin.

“God, Seungmin, what the fuck!?” He splutters, face red from pain.

“Hyunjin was fucking arrested. Do you know what Jisung did?” The hiss is scary at this point.

He lets out a little smile of satisfaction. Jisung was successful then. “Sung may have told me about his plan.”

“What the fuck, Lee Minho? Are you and Jisung serious? He was fucking arrested. What did he do to you that you would do this to him? I cannot believe you! You are my friend and he's also my friend.”

“He hurts you.” Minho whispers.

Seungmin stares and halts. Minho's not meeting his eyes anymore. Minho is not sure whether he wants to let Seungmin in the apartment for the very first time.

“And so?”

“You're my friend, too, Seungmin.” He says carefully, taking a deep breath. “Come in.”

“No, Minho hyung, you can't----”

“Let's call Jisung over and you can direct your anger to him. He thought about this.”

But once Jisung comes, he is with a slender and beautiful man named Lee Felix and Seungmin cannot say anything anymore since the couple has asked to watch TV shows and they end up all berating all the shows they can find on TV.

Just that the next morning, he finds himself tangle with Seung body and he's not certain if he dislikes it or not.

☆

Minho is not in love. Or that’s what he likes to make himself believe. And it’s not like he hasn’t fallen in love. He has, countless of times. But he isn’t in love right now. But Han fucking Jisung drops the bomb and Minho has it bad.

He likes spending time with Seungmin. Seungmin is the epitome of a sarcastic asshole with split personalities. One moment he is nice as fuck, giving him out-of-the-blue compliments “Uhm… I think your lips are pretty.”, or Seungmin is the reincarnation of the Devil himself (his bruises can attest to that). He may be spending an unhealthy amount of time with him (he likes to believe he is trying to recuperate Seungmin from a heart break, that’s all). So why is Han fucking Jisung in front of him again with that knowing Look and Smirk?

“Come again, Sung?” His mouth open? A big fat check.

“You’re dating Kim Seungmin.” It is not even a question or an accusation. It’s a simple statement.

“Errrr.. no?”

Jisung laughs heartily, wiggling his eyebrows and never in Minho's entire existence wants to shave all his dongsaeng's eyebrows except for now.

“Would you like to repeat that after seeing this?” Jisung asks, handing him his phone. “And yes, whether you want to delete it or not is up to yours. I have already sent a copy of that to Lixie.”

_Fuck this._

Because on the photo is none other than Kim Seungmin on top of Lee Minho's chest, cuddling himself like a baby, eyes closed and looks so comfortable on his place. He looks so soft. And Minho --- Minho's right hand is on top of Seungmin's head and left hand on his waist as if he is trying to protect him. (From what? His mind screams at him.)

And oddly, fingers hovering on delete button but Minho is Whipped with a capital W. He doesn’t have the heart for it.

That’s when he meets Jisung's eyes, he panics. “I’m fucked, Sung, eh?”

Jisung nods at him pathetically, grabbing his phone back.

Minho, poor Minho, drops his head on the table, repeatedly smashing himself.

“Sung?”

“Hmm??”

“Can you send the photo to me?”

_Why the fuck not?_

☆

Minho knows it’s him before he really sees him. He is standing in front of his apartment door, shoulders too sagged for his liking. He tries looking at what’s interesting Seungmin on his doorknob but it is just a shiny metal doorknob, nothing more and nothing less.

“Are we going to have a staring contest with a doorknob?” He asks.

No answer.

He tries coughing to get his attention but Seungmin still stands there, pretty eyes stuck on his own doorknob so he opens it and shakes Seungmin out of his reverie.

Seungmin smiles, a little bit forced, a little bit painful and Minho's heart burns a little, too.

“Hi, Minho hyung.” He says. It's a little too dry, no bite like it used to. Minho wants the bite back.

And they come in. Minho thinks he needs to leave his heart outside to spare himself from a heart ache.

“Have you ever fallen in love?”

It’s not the question Minho expects from Seungmin. He is more than surprised because he never thought he’d be interested at all.

So he shrugs. “And may I ask what makes you interested about my life?”

“Hyunjin.”

Minho closes his fists. _Of fucking course._

Seungmin takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. He’s so beautiful, Minho wants to yell. Painfully beautiful. The kind of beauty that hurts you inside. The kind of beauty that leaves ache in your heart for a long time. And it’s okay because it’s Seungmin, no matter how fucked up that sounds.

How can Hyunjin miss this beauty?

“He told me he’s dating someone that looks as pretty as me. And he’s showed me their photos together.”

Minho clears his throat. “Verdict?”

“I don’t know? But really, he is too beautiful? Too pretty? But that is not the problem. I can’t believe he thinks I’m pretty but all these years, he’s been just not seeing me. Am I that easy to miss? Why would he tell me that and just completely missed out my existence in his life? I don’t understand.” Seungmin rambles.

Minho wants him to stop. To stop from walking here and there and to stop hoping. Or maybe just both.

Because when he lets Seungmin in in his apartment and his life, he isn’t informed that along that, he gives him a permission to also feel the pain Seungmin is feeling. Because he is also frustrated. And hurt. And confused. But mostly, frustrated. How can someone be as beautiful and wonderful as Seungmin get hurt over a love that he’s been trying to hide from his own roommate and best friend?

“--- ho hyung. Lee Minho!” Seungmin shouts, making him sit up straight on his seat. Seungmin's pouts cutely. “See? Even you cannot take me seriously!”

_Whipped_.

“I’m not.”

“Do you think I’m throwing myself too much on Hyunjin?”

“No.” Because honest to God, he doesn’t.

“Then why can’t he see me then?” Seungmin frustrated scream echoes in his apartment.

Minho stops and stares and pulls Seungmin on top of him on the couch.

“Maybe --- there’s someone out there who fits you perfectly more.” He runs his fingers through his hair.

Seungmin looks up with his curious eyes, and Minho feels like dying. “Is he on the way to save me?”

“Maybe not on a white horse, but he is definitely going there.”

“Can you tell him to hurry up?”

“Why?”

“Because I’m tired of this.”

Minho dies a little bit more.

When Minho wakes up in the middle of the night, he almost loses his shit seeing Jisung in his apartment, creepily looking at them which promptly sends Seungmin on the floor. But that's because he's too surprised to see Jisung with his hand on his waist and a phone on the other.

“Way to be romantic, Minho hyung.” Sarcasm drips on Jisung's words.

Minho groans. “I thought I saw a ghost and I was scared out of my shit. But then it was just you.”

Jisung makes an indignant noise. Minho ignores in favor of trying to pull up Seungmin again who is still nowhere near of consciousness.

“Minho hyung, now you’re not gonna be a third wheel for Lixie and I. Maybe we can have a double date together?”

“Sung,” Minho's voice is hoarse. “the only third wheel in this apartment is you. Yah, Kim Seungmin, come back here.”

Seungmin climbs back again and Jisung makes another indignant noise.

“Please close the door once you leave.” He reminds him.

Once the both of them are finally awake, they see a box of chicken half eaten by none other than the Petty Jisung himself.

☆

Seungmin is a little bit scared. A little bit unsure and a little bit unsteady. Once he gets back to his apartment after spending the night over at Minho's, there's something a little bit of unknown tension in the air. The way Minho pulled him in and the way he wrapped his arms around him feels something right.

It's as if the elder cared for him. Maybe he does, they're friends after all.

Seungmin finds himself contemplating about love and life inside his apartment's living room and Hyunjin excitedly bounces next to him, asking him to play some games and asking him to watch some movies on the coming Saturday. He still waits for a sudden “falling in love with my roommate slash best friend” once more but it is not there. Not anymore.

But when he sees Minho in the hallway when he has to buy some groceries on a Thursday, inviting Seungmin for some drinks (seriously, Minho is alcoholic) on Saturday, he politely declines and tells him that he's spending time with Hyunjin instead.

The elder only shrugs and smirks. That rude smug smirk on his face that spells danger and Seungmin misses a tiny bit of his heart beat. Minho then strides forward him, determination painting his sun-kissed skin and then traps him on the wall.

Lee Minho then ruffles his hair, and tells him to “Enjoy your best friend date with Hyunjin, okay.” And that's after Lee Minho snoops in to leave Kim Seungmin breathless. His lips are soft despite how it looks and he tastes like Seungmin's favorite flavor: mint chocolate.

And even the week after, because maybe Hyunjin is trying to at least win back their friendship, he invites him once more to spend his Saturday with him. In which Seungmin (he's not sure why he needs Minho's approval. It's not like Minho is his Mom) tells Minho again. Minho only nods but not without leaving Seungmin's already chapped lips more swollen.

  
  


  
  


“You're okay?” Hyunjin asks, head digging on his lap.

Seungmin glances at him. He normally looks adorable for Seungmin. All smile and eyes crinkle like moons in the sky. But not this time. “Yes.”

“Do you like him?” Hyunjin questions, once more, a little more like of a whisper.

Seungmin snaps at Hyunjin and whacks his head for asking nonsense.

Hyunjin's laughter echoes inside the apartment. But he doesn't notice how loud he is, or how Hyunjin's head lies on him. (It should be, because he's in love with Hyunjin). But all he sees is thin lips --- almost black to violet lips on him. It's not Hyunjin's giggles he's hearing in his mind.

He's hearing Minho's instead. Seungmin is so fucked up.

Hyunjin teases him so and leaves Seungmin all by himself in the living room to think about life.

That's when he decides that men are indeed confusing, or maybe only Lee Minho. Just him.

☆

“You look awfully terrible today.” Felix jeers as soon as he sees Minho manning the cashier in the cafe the elder works at. Minho glares at him. He hasn't slept a wink these days. Not that he keeps track of it but it's been four days since Seungmin last spent time with Hyunjin for a Saturday movie date. And it's been four days since he also last saw him.

Does it bug him? _Never_.

Minho groans. It's also awfully slow day in the cafe. Felix is the only new customer as of the moment. And it's not like Felix isn't a great view, on a contrary, he is, it's just that he's not into answering the jeers he's going to get.

And still, he hasn't seen Seungmin for a whole 90 hours, 16 minutes and 50 seconds. Not that he's counting.

“I think you got it bad, Minho hyung.” Well, he guesses Minho's misery is his friends' amusement. If his mind isn't bugged, he's sure he's having Felix's head in between his arms for a revenge.

“Can you like just order, asshole no. 1?” Minho groans at him.

Felix looks back and fakes a gasp. “Oh, wow is this how you treat a paying customer? Guess, I should tell this on Channie hyung.”

He shakes his head. “What do you want to order, asshole customer-nim?” He repeats.

The younger laughs maniacally and leans forward. “So when will you tell Seungmin that you like him?”

“I don't!” He yells, earning few glares from the two other customers inside the cafeteria.

“You do.” Still, Felix pushes.

And Minho is, actually. In love? Kind of, but he doesn't want to really show it to anyone. Not as of now. Not when Seungmin might still be in love with his best friend.

“When will you tell him?” Felix prods more.

Minho sighs. “When he's ready to fall in love with someone that is not The Idiot.”

“Wait --- aren't you The Idiot, too? How will you expect Seungmin to fall out of love with you?”

“Fuck you!” He curses. “Chan hyung! There's a customer who does not want to order! Shall I remove him from the premises now?” He yells.

All that Minho hears is a loud, “Shut the fuck up, Lee Minho! Felix is an angel and is a paying customer. Do your job and entertain him properly.”

“Do you want me and Sungie to plan an intervention, Minho hyung?” Felix has the audacity to wriggle his nonexistent greasy eyebrow at him.

Wow, he hates his friends and his life. But maybe not Kim Seungmin so much. Not so much like he's showing the younger.

☆

Seungmin has never hated his life before more than now. He's tried so hard to avoid Han Jisung and Lee Felix in so many ways possible (he's even tried hiding himself in the closet when he saw the two approaching him), but God is not always with him because Han Jisunghas his arms lock on his, and Lee Felix is holding his legs down.

_Really, Lee Felix?_ He is the only he's trusted but not anymore.

“What do you want?” He asks them.

Jisung blankly and seriously looks at him that Seungmin gets scared of his face. “You and Minho hyung.”

“What about me and him?”

“You are avoiding him.”

“What.” He deadpans at him.

The older flicks his forehead and hisses. “Minho hyung is my best friend.”

“Our.” Felix corrects him.

“Semantics.” Jisung says.

  
  


  
  


Felix glares at his boyfriend.

“-- our best friend.” Jisung continues, “We don't want to see him sad just because of you. We know he's an asshat, that much is very obvious.” Insert eye roll. “But we also think you're just as much as asshat for avoiding him.”

“I---” Seungmin wonders if it's true. Minho has tried cornering him one time in the hallway but good thing Hyunjin was there for a cover up. He even tried knocking on his apartment for a straight hour but he pretended to not exist and breathe at all that time. _God, why are you avoiding him, Kim Seungmin? And it's been what? Seven days?_

“That's the face that people make when they have epiphany.” Felix is now standing with a smug look on his face. Seungmin wonders if Felix has always been this smug or maybe Jisung has rubbed off on him since they are boyfriends.

_Boyfriends_ , it kinda rings a bell. At least, for him and Hyun --- Minho.

“You're in love with him.” Jisung flatly states.

Seungmin's eyes almost budge out his sockets. “I'm not!”

“That's the face of in denial.”

Felix proceeds to slap him on his forehead and preaches, “Minho hyung has been losing his sleep for the past few days. He's been thinking what if Seungmin is still in love with Hyunjin? What if Hyunjin reciprocates his one-sided love?”

“I'm not ----” _Not what, Seungmin?_ “I'm not in love with Hyunjin anymore.”

And then Jisung brushes his hand on Seungmin's hair. “We know, hun, we know.”

“But what if ---” Seungmin wonders if Minho is still in love with someone that's not him? Can he actually take that? “--- if he's still in love with someone else?”

Jisung and Felix eye each other and groan collectively, and then both send him a flying kick which leaves him on the floor.

Guess Minho is not in love with someone else.

☆

Felix and Jisung's intervention goes something like this:

Minho and Seungmin trap inside Minho's apartment. Seungmin looking awkwardly at anywhere except for Minho. And Minho looks like he's going to beg Seungmin for the world. Seungmin feels bad because Minho's eye bags are very obvious by now.

“Are you and Hyunjin dating now?” _What a loser_ , Minho thinks about himself.

Seungmin rolls his eyes at him. “Really, Minho hyung?”

“It's just that --- you haven't spent time with me.” If Minho can pout, he's not sure but he thinks he is doing it right now. Wow, he's Whipped for Kim Seungmin that much, huh.

“Jealousy is not good for you, Minho hyung.” Seungmin teases. “But, you know how I just spent time talking so much about my best friend and how much I have spent time dillydallying about my feelings for him? What if I can't be good enough for you?”

He sighs. “You know what I think?

“What? That I’m not pretty enough?”

Minho shakes his head and stands up, nearing the younger boy. With a smirk, Minho cups Seungmin's face with his own calloused hands. He turns beet red. And red suits Seungmin so much.

“I think you’re the prettiest. You have the prettiest eyes, they tell thousands of unspoken words --- of thousands of unspoken feelings. You have the prettiest mouth --- chapped and pink --- and only says the best things about The Idiot.”

At this, Seungmin pointedly glares.

Minho continues, “And on top of that, you have the prettiest heart because no matter how much you have been hurt continuously, you still try --- you still love. That’s what makes you the most beautiful.”

And Lee Minho leans forward and catches Seungmin's lips. The protest from Seungmin dies as they tangle their tongues together experimenting and trying to see who’s to dominate. Seungmin bits his tongue and Minho surrenders. Completely. All for the younger.

“Do you see me throwing myself to you?” Minho asks, his heart never missing a beat, tripling the speed of it.

Seungmin opens his mouth and closes. “I --- I don’t understand.”

“You will. And he will.” Minho says, once more capturing his lips.

Minho kisses Seungmin like he is fragile and delicate. He wraps his arms around Seungmin, like he is never letting any pain ruins the beauty of Seungmin.

Jisung and Felix's intervention be damned; it's too anticlimactic.

  
  


  
  


  
  


☆

It's nearing three in the morning when he hears loud hisses from the living room and if there is one thing that Seungmin is missing is the warmth next to him. So he gets up and sees his best friend and boyfriend standing in the living room.

  
  


  
  


“Stop sticking your dick in him, hyung. We both know what you want.” Hyunjin's voice sounds angry and it's the first time that Seungmin hears this kind of tone from Hyunjin. His best friend has always been sweet albeit dense.

  
  


  
  


The eldest only scoff and shakes his head in reply.

  
  


  
  


“You need to stop it right now.” Hyunjin half yells.

  
  


  
  


“And why is that, huh? What are you so scared of?” Minho challenges the younger. “Are you scared that Seungmin has fallen out of love from you completely? Are you scared to see him moving on from you, Hyunjin?”

  
  


  
  


He sees Hyunjin closing his fists from anger. “He is not your toy.”

  
  


  
  


“And neither is he yours! Stop acting like a child who's got his favorite toy lost, worse, stolen. If you were so in love with him, you would've stopped fucking around. You would've started looking at his way and not when someone's showing interest in him.”

  
  


  
  


So the elder is showing interest in him? That revelation gets his ears turn red. At least, it's no longer one-sided anymore, now Seungmin can confirm.

  
  


“Now, if you're much awake from the reality, may I be excused and I want to cuddle and get back to my boyfriend's bed now.” Minho dismisses and when he turns around, both he and Hyunjin look up at the youngest with wide eyes.

  
  


  
  


“Seung---” Hyunjin calls for him.

  
  


  
  


Seungmin acknowledges his roommate with a nod and offers his hand for the eldest one with a smile, “Couldn't really sleep, hyung. I missed your warmth.”

  
  


  
  


And if there is anything brighter than the smile on the elder's face, it's that how he feels for The Bastard himself.

  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


“Seungmin?”

Kim Seungmin looks up at Minho with expectant eyes, arms wrapped around each other on the elder's couch.

“I want you to fall in love with me.”

He smiles. “I easily fall in love.” He warns.

“So then fall. Fall in love with and for me.”

“But you are The Bastard. I don’t want to fall in love with The Bastard.”

Minho rolls his eyes at him. “You fell in love with The Biggest Fucking Idiot. God, thank God The Biggest Fucking Idiot is blind and both you and I regard his idiocy for missing out what’s in front of him.”

“And what’s that?”

Minho pinches his nose bridge with a smile and Seungmin thinks this is going to be easy. “A whole cake with a cherry on top.”

Seungmin wants to throw up so badly.

“I want you to heal, Seungmin. I want you to heal and free yourself from the love that The Idiot cannot offer. I want you to free yourself from it and I want you to move on.”

“Will you be with me?” He asks, hopeful.

Minho holds his hand. They are calloused but somehow, Seungmin finds both of their intertwined fingers fitting. It's like everything is suddenly making much more sense for the younger.

  
  


  
  


“Kim Seungmin, will you fall in love with me?” Minho asks.

_Will you fall in love with me?_

Maybe it’s not going to be so hard to move on. Not when Minho is there. As long as Minho is there. Seungmin may not be sure how it would happen but he knows it’s going to happen. Just as long as he knows he can hold Minho's calloused hands, as long as he can kiss Minho's bashful mouth, or as long as he can feel Minho's reliable arms on him.

It is going to happen.

And you know, for the falling part, too.

(Falling? He does. He falls and Minho is gladly catching him from that fall.)

☆

[“Can I just move in with you instead, boyfriend?”

“And what? We’re still going to hear Hyunjin and Daehwi fucking like rabbits.”

Seungmin fakes a gag at the sound. “Ugh. Do you think we should just move out to a new apartment?”

“I think we should.” Minho agrees.

  
  


  
  


There's a moment of silence as they continue their staring contest.

  
  


  
  


It's Minho's fingers twirling strand of hair on Seungmin that stops them from staring. “And I think we should adopt kids.”

  
  


  
  


“Kids?”

  
  


  
  


Minho pecks his nose lovingly. “Yes, three cats. You are a dog, my puppy and we should have cats instead!”

  
  


  
  


“Then we'll name them Soonie, Doongie, and Dori.”

  
  


  
  


The younger smiles at the thought of him and Minho sharing an apartment with three cats. He likes that.

A moment of silence.

“And—” Minho says.

“And what?”

“I like the sound of it.”

“Of what?”

Minho holds him closer, bumping his nose against him. “The sound of you calling me boyfriend, boyfriend.”

And Kim Seungmin blushes Fifty shades of Pink.]

♡

_We are running so fast_

_And we never look back_

_And whatever I lack, you make up_

_We make a really good team_

_And not everyone sees_

_We got this crazy chemistry_

_Between us_

  
  



End file.
